In perhaps the most surreal moment of a severe federal trial, Diddy momentarily stopped the gravitas of a life-or-death legal battle only to grumble he “looked like some kind of koala bear” in a courtroom sketch.
Between testimony in his ongoing sex trafficking and racketeering conspiracy trial in Manhattan, the beleaguered music man took a moment to offer some criticism to veteran courtroom sketch artist Jane Rosenberg that had nothing to do with the law. “You made me look like a koala bear,” he was said to have told her as if the ears were the problem here. Rosenberg’s quick-witted reply? “You should be so lucky.”
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It is a weird scene that is somehow paradigmatic of the odd dissonance surrounding Diddy’s presence in the courtroom. He is facing life imprisonment due to five serious criminal charges, including sex trafficking, but he’s worried that he looks like an adorable eucalyptus-munching marsupial.
Meanwhile, just minutes after the scolding in the sketch, U.S. District Judge Arun Subramanian rattled the room with a stern warning after Diddy got caught nodding in agreement to the jury during cross-examination. The judge was crystal clear: Influence the panel again, and you’re out of the courtroom.
The courtroom shenanigans unfold against a backdrop of serious allegations. Federal prosecutors are painting a harrowing picture of many years of abuse. Witnesses have featured Bryana Bongolan, a former pal of Cassie Ventura, as well as Diddy’s ex-assistant “Mia,” staffers at the hotel, sex workers, and others. Taken together, their accounts paint a darker picture than Rosenberg’s koala-inspired trance: one that involves allegations of coercion, manipulation, and drug-fueled “freak-offs.”
The trial continued with Jane Doe on the stand, detailing gruesome accounts of being drugged, made to have unprotected sex with prostitutes, and multi-day abuse sessions hosted by Diddy. Her testimony is some of the most disturbing to come out yet, and it further underlines the severity of the charges the artist formerly known as Puff Daddy is facing.
Weirdly, Diddy’s comment might be the most honest we’ll get into his frame of mind at this moment: a man more worried about his appearance than the possibility that the walls are starting to close in around him. It’s as if he remains onstage, still marshaling the brand, even as the gavel approaches.
Whether Diddy’s critique might enter history as a punch line or an act of profound denial, he was in a courtroom, not on a concert stage. And in this building, no swagger or side-eyes to the jury will help paint a prettier picture.
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